White House Maid Reports Terrifying Encounter with First Lady on Ceiling
By
The Onion Staff
Looks the part, but the middle's still raw. Chew with caution.
Summary
A White House maid reportedly screamed in terror after spotting First Lady Melania Trump on the ceiling of the Executive Residence, dropping and shattering a vase she was dusting. The maid expressed horror as an unidentified slimy substance dripped on her shoulder and noticed the first lady hissing at her, while also discovering the doors were locked.
Key quotes
· 3 pulledWhat on earth is that clicking sound? Oh my God, ahhhhhh!
I'm sorry, I shouldn't be here right now. Oh, no, no, no—the doors are locked!
Please, Madam First Lady, let me go! Wait, why are you looking at me like th
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