Satirical Study Claims Americans Choosing Carnival Over College
By
The Onion Staff
Summary
A satirical article from The Onion reports on a fictional University of Missouri study claiming that more young Americans are skipping college to let "the carnival sort them out." The piece uses absurd humor to mock both higher education anxieties and carnival culture, presented as a faux-scientific news report.
Source
The OnionSatirical Study Claims Americans Choosing Carnival Over Collegetheonion.comKey quotes
· 3 pulled'In a dire job market like this, it doesn't make sense to spend tens of thousands of dollars on a degree when you can just let the carnival sort you out,' said lead researcher Dr. Kevin Miller.
'The carnival doesn't care about your GPA or your extracurriculars. It just wants to know if you can guess which cup the ball is under,' Miller added.
'I was going to go to community college, but then I saw the carny with the mallet and the stuffed animals, and I thought, 'That guy has his life together,' said one study participant.
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