The Onion's Satirical Summer Plans Feature Celebrities Making Absurd Vacation Claims
By
The Onion Staff
Summary
A satirical article from The Onion featuring celebrities sharing absurd and humorous fake summer plans. Sabrina Carpenter plans to sit on books to drive safely, Ariana Grande wants to go to a spa that kills you, Ina Garten intends to cast out a fridge ghost, and MrBeast is evading something. The piece parodies celebrity interview culture with dark, deadpan comedy.
Source
The OnionThe Onion's Satirical Summer Plans Feature Celebrities Making Absurd Vacation Claimstheonion.comKey quotes
· 3 pulledI have a big stack of books that I'm excited to sit on so I can safely drive.
I'm going to a spa in Switzerland where they kill you.
I say I'll do this every summer, but this time I actually mean it: I'm going to cast out the ghost that's living in my fridge.
You might also wanna read
Satirical article claims Emma Stone quit waiting tables after 11 years
A satirical article claiming that actress Emma Stone is quitting her job waiting tables after 11 years, despite being a well-established Hol
The Onion·4h ago
Satirical Headline Collection: Absurd and Humorous News Parodies
This is not a genuine news article about drone smuggling into prisons. The content is a collection of absurd, satirical headlines (e.g., "Na
The Onion·4h ago
Family Airs Out Elderly Grandmother in Yard Due to Odor
A satirical news article from The Onion about a family in Zanesville, Ohio who set their elderly grandmother, Phyllis Hargrave (89), outside
The Onion·4h ago
Satirical Recap: AEW Forbidden Door 2026 Coverage from a WWE Fan Perspective
A satirical, over-the-top "live coverage" recap of AEW x NJPW x Stardom x CMLL Forbidden Door 2026, written from the perspective of a fictio
Satirical piece critiques the expansion of online gambling and prediction markets
A satirical article about Mark Zuckerberg allegedly believing Meta isn't doing enough to cater to gambling addicts. The piece uses humor to
The A.V. Club·2d ago
WWE SmackDown London Review: Solo Sikoa's Bloodline Unravels Ahead of Night of Champions
A satirical, character-driven review of WWE SmackDown from London, written in the persona of "El Presidente." The piece covers Solo Sikoa's
Comments
Sign in to join the conversation.
No comments yet. Be the first.