Satirical Report: Eric Adams Allegedly Debates Rats in Gracie Mansion
By
The Onion Staff
A touch underbaked. Edible, but you'll want a strong coffee alongside.
Summary
A satirical piece describing New York City Mayor Eric Adams allegedly capturing rats and forcing them to act out a private debate in his Gracie Mansion bedroom, complete with dressing them in tiny suits and ties and positioning them behind miniature podiums.
Key quotes
· 3 pulled"Thank you for that question," responds Eric Adams to swarm of rats he forced to act out debate
"It's interesting you ask me that, Mr. Moderator—I certainly would have to say that the best part of New York is its people," said Adams
Adams paused to grab one of the rats he had sewn into a tiny suit and tie, repositioning it behind a small cardboard podium
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