Satirical Article Imagines Trump Flushing a Masseuse Down a Toilet
By
The Onion Staff
A bagel that needed a few more minutes. And maybe a fact-check.
Summary
The article describes a satirical scenario where President Donald Trump allegedly attempts to flush a 14-year-old masseuse down a toilet to dispose of damaging evidence related to Jeffrey Epstein. The exaggerated and absurd nature of the content suggests it is not factual.
Key quotes
· 1 pulled“Oh Christ, c’mon, Ashley, don’t get stuck—uh, just gimme one second in here!” Trump said as he jiggled the handle in a futile attempt to pass the stuck high school freshman through the toilet’s 3-inch drainpipe.
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