Woman Discovers Display Corpse Still in Purchased Casket
By
The Onion Staff
Crumbles when you bite it. Light on filling.
Summary
A woman in Athens, Georgia discovers that the casket she purchased still contains a stock corpse - a handsome, well-groomed model body used for display purposes. She notes the corpse is more attractive than her deceased brother and comments on the deceptive practice of using perfect-looking bodies to sell caskets.
Key quotes
· 3 pulledI get that they want to sell caskets, but it feels kind of dishonest to put these perfect dead bodies with their ideal facial features in there
It's a nice place holder, I suppose, even though John was never this well groomed when alive
I'll admit this stock corpse is easing me into the grieving
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