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Supreme Court Imposes Nationwide Injunction on Bottomless Shrimp Deals

By

The Onion Staff

11mo ago· 2 min readenNews

Summary

The Supreme Court rules that they have eaten too many shrimp and imposes a nationwide injunction on bottomless shrimp deals.

Key quotes

· 3 pulled
"The court holds that we as a judicial body have consumed far more shrimp than anyone could reasonably deem appropriate, let alone advisable, and therefore we find it prudent to impose a nationwide injunction on bottomless shrimp deals, effective immediately," Chief Justice John Roberts
"tasty little crustaceans"
"bloated and moaning Supreme Court"
Snippet from the RSS feed
WASHINGTON—In a landmark decision opposed only by Justice Neil Gorsuch, who advocated for at least one more serving of the “tasty little crustaceans,” a bloated and moaning Supreme Court ruled Friday that they had eaten too many shrimp. “The court holds t

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