Satirical News Report: Man Allegedly Falls Backward Onto Knife in Apartment
By
The Onion Staff
Front-window bakery material. Catches the eye, delivers the goods.
Summary
The article appears to be a satirical news piece from The Onion about Antonio D'Angelo, 63, who allegedly fell backward onto a knife in his apartment. The content is presented in a humorous, deadpan style typical of The Onion's satire, with minimal actual story content and mostly consisting of website template elements, weather information, and navigation menus.
Key quotes
· 4 pulledAntonio D'Angelo, 63, fell backward onto a knife in his apartment Tuesday, and that's all you need to know.
Sorry, some heat indexes you just want to keep for yourself
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