Satirical Article: Trump Portrayed as Suggesting Financial Benefits of War Casualties
By
The Onion Staff
Crackles when you bite it. Shows the baker did the work.
Summary
The article satirically portrays President Trump suggesting that Americans should find comfort in not having to pay their son's cell phone bill if he dies in a potential war with Iran. The piece presents this as a cynical economic argument for war, framing the financial savings from not paying phone bills, taxes, and fees as a supposed benefit of military casualties.
Key quotes
· 3 pulledYou may be grieving at first, but, believe me, you'll be smiling when you see how much less you're shelling out every month
parents should bear in mind upon viewing their son's flag-draped casket that they'll not only save on their base family plan, but also enjoy lower taxes and fees
Striking a note of optimism as the prospects for a protracted conflict with Iran grew likelier
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