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Satirical Article About Newlyweds and Football Team Loyalty

By

The Onion Staff

9mo ago· 5 min readen

Summary

The article appears to be a satirical piece from The Onion about a couple, Anna Tsang and Matthew Valentine, who have recently married. The content suggests the bride will now reluctantly support the groom's football team as part of their marital relationship. The article is presented in the style of The Onion's characteristic humor and satire.

Key quotes

· 4 pulled
Now that they've tied the knot, the bride will begrudgingly root for the groom's stupid little football team
Sorry, some heat indexes you just want to keep for yourself
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Now that they’ve tied the knot, the bride will begrudgingly root for the groom’s stupid little football team.

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