Satirical piece imagines Planet Fitness annexing GameStop in 'Judgement Free Zone' expansion
By
The Onion Staff
4d ago· 2 min readen
Summary
A satirical article about Planet Fitness allegedly annexing a nearby GameStop as part of an imperialistic expansion of their "Judgement Free Zone," with the CEO claiming the video game retailer promotes "sloth and self-pleasure." The piece uses exaggerated, humorous language to parody corporate expansion and gym culture.
Source
The OnionSatirical piece imagines Planet Fitness annexing GameStop in 'Judgement Free Zone' expansiontheonion.comKey quotes
· 3 pulledIn our commitment to improving the world's physique, we must take what is rightfully ours.
The sun shall never set on the beginner-friendly community of Planet Fitness
the GameStop promoted 'sloth and self-pleasure' and needed to be commandeered for the glory of the gym chain's mission
HANNIBAL, MO—Expanding their exercise empire through a hostile takeover of the nearby business, the imperialistic Planet Fitness reportedly annexed a nearby GameStop Thursday as part of their Judgement Free Zone. “In our commitment to improving the world’
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