Description of a Simple Rustic Dwelling
By
The Onion Staff
Even the toaster can't save this one.
Summary
The article describes a simple, rustic dwelling that is described as 'humble and rudely constructed' but offers basic comforts of warmth, dryness, and space to sleep on flax bedding for an evening.
Key quotes
· 2 pulledTis a humble and rudely constructed domicile, true, but 'tis warm and dry
there be space enough to lay your head on some flax and pass an evening's time
You might also wanna read

My Unexpected Life as a Neighborhood Cat Sitter and Tutor
A personal narrative about the author's life-changing experience of becoming an impromptu cat sitter and tutor for three neighborhood cats—C
Georgia Man Debates Which Shirt Deserves His Only Wooden Hanger
A man in Thomasville, Georgia spends several agonizing minutes trying to decide which of his shirts deserves to be hung on his single wooden
The Physical Discomfort of Reading: Why Every Position Eventually Hurts
The article is a humorous, self-deprecating personal essay about the author's annual struggle to read more books and the physical discomfort
Grandmother Removes Raisins from Home Due to Temptation Concerns
A grandmother from Wichita, Kansas admits she cannot keep raisins in her home because she finds them too tempting and fears they will ruin h
Chicago Man's System: Different Hot Dog Places for Every Level of Sobriety
A Chicago man named Ken Stafford has developed a highly calibrated system over years of trial and error where he has specific favorite hot d
Woman Uses Timers to Intentionally Increase Stress During Cleaning
A local woman from Coppell, Texas intentionally sets timers to make her cleaning chores more stressful, explaining that she prefers to break
