Celtics Coach Mazzulla Says Jayson Tatum Must Pass Logic-Puzzle Test Before Returning From Injury
By
The Onion Staff
Toasted to a respectable shade. No regrets, no crumbs left.
Summary
Boston Celtics head coach Joe Mazzulla announced that injured star Jayson Tatum will not return to play until he successfully completes the 'Mazzulla Logic-Puzzle Meridian,' a riddle-based mental readiness assessment that Tatum has been struggling with. Mazzulla expressed frustration with repeated questions about Tatum's return timeline and emphasized that the player must score at least an eight on the logic test before being cleared to play.
Key quotes
· 3 pulledLook, I know it's your guys' job to ask, but my answer is the same as always: Jayson won't be back on the floor until he scores at least an eight on the Mazzulla Logic Meridian, and he's just not there yet
Jayson Tatum would remain sidelined until he successfully completed the 'Mazzulla Logic-Puzzle Meridian,' a riddle- and reason-based gauntlet he devised to assess players' mental readiness
a visibly annoyed Mazzulla told reporters Tuesday that Jayson Tatum would remain sidelined until he successfully completed the 'Mazzulla Logic-Puzzle Meridian'
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