Satirical article: Travis Kelce panics over wedding cake bride figurine, mistakes it for Taylor Swift
By
The Onion Staff
Summary
A satirical news article from The Onion-style publication describes a fictional scene where NFL star Travis Kelce panics upon seeing the miniature bride figurine on top of a wedding cake, mistaking it for a shrunken Taylor Swift. He frantically questions the figurine before realizing the miniature groom is himself.
Source
Key quotes
· 3 pulledBabe, you shrunk!
Taylor, no, God, no—it's going to be okay babe, just tell me who did this to you!
Wait, who the hell's this guy? Are you leaving me for a miniature man, babe?
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