8,500-Year-Old Stone Age Settlement Discovered Underwater in Denmark's Bay of Aarhus
By
The Onion Staff
Pulled from the oven just right. Trustworthy, fact-dense, deeply satisfying.
Summary
Archaeologists have discovered an 8,500-year-old Stone Age settlement preserved underwater in Denmark's Bay of Aarhus. The ancient settlement has been remarkably preserved like a time capsule due to being submerged by rising sea levels. The article includes humorous public reactions to the discovery.
Key quotes
· 3 pulled"Enjoy it now. It'll all be condos and Citibanks by next year."
"Makes you wonder what else water's trying to hide."
"If they need a wet/dry vac vendor, my brother-in-law can cut them a deal."
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