Satirical Article: Woman Tired of Searching for Mr. Bean-Like Partner
By
The Onion Staff
A second-rack bagel that's nearly first-rack. Tasty stuff.
Summary
A satirical article about a single woman in Spokane, Washington who is tired of searching for a romantic partner resembling the comedic character Mr. Bean. The piece humorously describes her longing for a 'bug-eyed man-child' who is buffoonish and mishap-prone, similar to the British television character. She expresses frustration that her friends are finding such partners while she continues her search for a goofy, tweed-jacketed man who would propose in a bizarrely low-pitched voice.
Key quotes
· 3 pulledLamenting that she still hadn't found the bug-eyed man-child of her dreams, area bachelorette Louise Perkins confirmed Tuesday that she was growing tired of constantly looking for Mr. Bean.
It seems like all my friends are settling down with buffoonish, mishap-prone men, but no matter how many dates I go on, I just can't seem to find a Mr. Bean of my own.
I don't think I'm being too picky. I longed for the day when a goofy, tweed-jacketed man would get down on one knee and say 'Bean?' to her in a bizarrely low-pitched voice.
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