Satirical Article: Fan Wins Open-Heart Surgery From Medical Drama Actors
By
The Onion Staff
Yesterday's bagel, baked twice. Familiar and a bit tough.
Summary
A satirical news piece about a fictional contest where a fan wins open-heart surgery performed by actors from the medical drama 'The Pitt'. The article describes how producers announced the promotion as a 'once-in-a-lifetime opportunity' and features a contest winner who expressed excitement about getting a triple bypass from actor Noah Wyle.
Key quotes
· 3 pulled"I wrote in to explain how much I love the show and how severe my atherosclerosis is, but I never imagined they'd actually pick me"
"It's been surreal. This morning I arrived at the Warner Bro"
"I'd been wanting a triple bypass from Noah Wyle ever since the actor's ER days"
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