Collection of Satirical News Headlines and Parody Stories
By
The Onion Staff
A five-star bake. Worth schmearing, sharing, saving.
Summary
A collection of absurd, satirical headlines presented as news items, including fake stories about Rob Kardashian selling oregano to Timothée Chalamet, a couple dying exactly 10 helicopter blade rotations apart, and other humorous fictional news snippets. The content is clearly parody/satire rather than real news reporting.
Key quotes
· 5 pulled'Erm,' Reports British Novel Protagonist
Couple Married For 50 Years Dies Only 10 Rotations Of Helicopter Blades Apart
Man Who Spent Months On Scheme Heartbroken To Hear It Called 'Harebrained'
All Good Baby Names Already Taken By Ninja Turtles
Foolhardy Scratch-Off Ticket Offers Absurd 6 Ways To Win
You might also wanna read
The Onion Satirizes Fan Outrage Over 'The Mandalorian And Grogu' Being Ranked Third-Best Star Wars Film
A satirical article from The Onion reporting that fans are "slamming" the upcoming film 'The Mandalorian And Grogu' as the third-best Star W
The Onion Satirizes Fan Outrage Over 'The Mandalorian And Grogu' Being Ranked Third-Best Star Wars Film
A satirical article from The Onion reporting that fans are "slamming" the upcoming film 'The Mandalorian And Grogu' as the third-best Star W
Satire: Harry Styles Tour Merch Reportedly Includes Perimenopause Supplements
A satirical article reporting that Harry Styles' 2026 "Together, Together" tour merchandise includes perimenopause supplements priced at $65

How Garry Trudeau and Doonesbury Satirized Donald Trump Over Decades
An excerpt from a biography about Garry Trudeau and Doonesbury, focusing on how the cartoonist approached the 2016 election cycle. Initially
Satirical article imagines Pope issuing encyclical criticizing Disney's Star Wars strategy
A satirical article about Pope Leo XIV releasing a 60,000-word encyclical titled "Palpatinus Referendum" criticizing Disney's handling of th

The Onion's Satirical Top Songs List for May 2026 Parodies News and Modern Life
A satirical article from The Onion presenting a list of absurd, fictional "top songs" for May 2026. The song titles are humorous and surreal
