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Conservative Man Regrets Drunkenly Removing Neo-Nazi Tattoo

By

The Onion Staff

1mo ago· 2 min readen

Summary

A conservative man named Nate Hanlon in Coeur d'Alene, Idaho, wakes up with a hangover to discover he drunkenly got a neo-Nazi tattoo removed. He expresses regret about the removal, worrying about how he'll cover up his now hate-symbol-free skin and blaming tequila for his poor decision-making.

Key quotes

· 3 pulled
Shit, shit, shit—there's no way I can go outside looking like this
God, it was that last round of tequilas that did me in. Never would have done something so stupid if I'd stuck to beers
How am I supposed to explain this to my friends at the militia meeting?
Snippet from the RSS feed
COEUR D’ALENE, ID—Wincing from a pounding headache and hazy memories of debauchery, regretful conservative Nate Hanlon reportedly woke up Wednesday morning to find that he had drunkenly gotten a neo-Nazi tattoo removed. “Shit, shit, shit—there’s no way I

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