Satire: Cannes Jury Reportedly Sneaks Off to Watch 'Mortal Kombat II'
By
The Onion Staff
A weekday bagel. Dependable, satisfying, no fuss.
Summary
A satirical article from The Onion reporting that the Cannes Film Festival jury secretly snuck away from the prestigious event to watch a matinee showing of Mortal Kombat II, with actor Stellan Skarsgård leading the group through an emergency exit.
Key quotes
· 2 pulledCome on, no one's looking, just go
Don't worry, [Park] Chan-wook, we're not going to get in trouble. We'll be back before the last film's over. They won't eve
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