Satirical Timeline: The Onion's Humorous Take on St. Patrick's Day History
By
The Onion Staff
2mo ago· 1 min readen
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Summary
The Onion presents a satirical historical timeline of St. Patrick's Day, mocking the holiday's evolution from a Catholic feast day to a global celebration of Irish culture. The timeline includes absurd fictional events like St. Patrick kicking snakes out of Ireland for failing to meet a three-drink minimum, St. Brigid inventing the 'puke and rally,' and various humorous takes on Irish-American stereotypes and drinking culture throughout history.
Key quotes
· 4 pulledSt. Patrick kicks all the snakes out of Ireland for failing to meet the three-drink minimum.
St. Brigid of Kildare invents the puke and rally.
Millions of Irish immigrants come to America, where they were oppressed too, you know.
Guy with a pinching fetish gets
Originally a Catholic feast day for the patron saint of Ireland, St. Patrick’s Day has evolved into a global celebration of Irish heritage and culture. The Onion presents a historical timeline of the holiday. 432 A.D. St. Patrick kicks all the snakes out
