Collection of Satirical Headlines and One-Liners
By
The Onion Staff
Recycled flavour. You've tasted this bagel before.
Summary
This article is a collection of absurd, humorous, and satirical headlines or one-liners that appear to be from a comedy publication (likely The Onion or similar). The content includes jokes about doctors recommending grave-digging for bone health, a Law & Order writer struggling for story ideas, baby names being taken by Ninja Turtles, and other random comedic premises. There is no substantive article content—just a list of punchlines or headlines.
Key quotes
· 5 pulled'Erm,' Reports British Novel Protagonist
Man Who Spent Months On Scheme Heartbroken To Hear It Called 'Harebrained'
Baby's First Steps No Match For Push Notification
Busty Friend Pulls Flask, Cocktail Glass, Lawn Chair Out Of Cleavage
Amber Alert Describing Wienermobile
The post Doctors Say Digging Own Grave Keeps Bones Healthy After Menopause appeared first on The Onion.
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