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Satirical piece portrays Sam Altman as villain claiming intelligence will be a paid utility

9h ago· 3 min readen

Summary

A satirical article depicting OpenAI CEO Sam Altman suggesting intelligence will become a utility that people pay for, portrayed as operating from a villainous skull-shaped volcano lair. The piece humorously critiques AI companies scraping internet content without permission, framing Altman as a cartoonish supervillain who steals data and sells it back.

Key quotes

· 3 pulled
"At OpenAI, we believe that intelligence is the commodity of the future," intoned Altman from atop a fearsome throne fashioned from the bones of vanquished Silicon Valley rivals.
"Our revolutionary company has disrupted the status quo to chart a bold vision forward," he added, referring to a process that scraped the entire internet for written content without permission.
"We see a future where intelligence is a utility, and people buy it from us," says Sam Altman from skull-shaped volcano lair
Snippet from the RSS feed
EVIL LAIR, SOUTH PACIFIC - OpenAI CEO Sam Altman has suggested that intelligence could someday be treated as a utility, with people paying him directly to access materials stolen from them en masse, all from a subterranean lair shaped like a skull.

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