"Unemployed Developer's Playful Challenge: Slowing Down Postgres by 42,000x"
By
AsyncBanana
10mo ago· 15 min readenOpinion
100/100
Golden Brown
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Score100TypeopinionSentimentpositive
Summary
The article humorously explores the unconventional idea of intentionally slowing down Postgres, a popular database system, as a playful challenge. The author, who is unemployed, details their attempt to configure Postgres to process queries as slowly as possible, turning the typical optimization goal on its head. The piece includes technical parameters and a lighthearted tone, making it both informative and entertaining.
Key quotes
· 3 pulledEveryone is always wondering how to make Postgres faster, more efficient, etc, but nobody ever thinks about how to make Postgres slower.
As I was writing a slightly more useful guide, I decided someone needed to try to create a Postgres configuration optimized to process queries as slowly as possible.
This is a Postgres tuning challenge, not a throttle-
As an respectable unemployed person must do, I tried to make Postgres as slow as possible
